A few days back, on a morning like any other, I had a sudden realization: I was in danger of wasting my life. As I stared out the fogged window of a New Delhi City bus, I realized I did nothing yet. “What do I want from life?” I asked myself. “Well…I want to be happy.” I had many reasons to be happy: I stayed with my cute lovely sister, and have a very supportive family though sometimes I felt depressed without any reason; I want to be a writer, living in my favourite city the capital of India. I had friends; I had dreams in my life; I didn’t have to colour my hair. I felt dejected after even a minor professional setback. I cheated on my friends, I lost my temper easily. Is that how a happy person would act? I would love to be happier, as I’m sure not only most but also all people would, so I thought it would be interesting to find some ways to become a happier person. So I decided on the spot to begin a systematic study of happiness. (A little intense, I know. But that’s the kind of thing that appeals to me.).I tried a lot & trust me now I am much happier compared to last year.
“Action may not always bring happiness, but there is no happiness without action.” ~Benjamin Disraeli
Happiness is so interesting because we all have different ideas about what it is and how to get it. I found some interesting scientific facts about happiness:-
1. Sleep more –It helps less sensitivity to negative emotions
We know that sleep helps our bodies to recover from the day and repair themselves and that it helps us focus and be more productive. It turns out, which is important for our happiness. Of course, how well (and how long) you sleep will probably affect how you feel when you wake up, which can make a difference to your whole day.
2. Keep smiling – it can relieve pain
Smiling itself can make us feel better, but it’s more effective when we back it up with positive thoughts. Smiling makes us feel good which also increases our attentional flexibility and our ability to think holistically. Smiling releases serotonin in the brain, which instantaneously gives your mood a lift.
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3. Meditate
Meditation is often touted as an important habit for improving focus, clarity and attention span, as well as helping to keep you calm. It turns out it’s also useful for improving your happiness. Meditation literally clears your mind and calms you down, it’s been often proven to be the single most effective way to live a happier life.
4. Express gratitude – increase both happiness and life satisfaction
Gratitude is more than saying thank you. It’s a sense of wonder, appreciation and, yes, thankfulness for life. It’s easy to go through life without recognizing our good fortune. Often, it takes a serious illness or other tragic events to jolt people into appreciating the good things in their lives. Don’t wait for something like that to happen to you. Make a commitment to practice gratitude. Each day identifies at least one thing that enriches your life. When you find yourself thinking an ungrateful thought, try substituting a grateful one. For example, replace “my sister forgot my birthday” with “my sister has always been there for me in tough times.”
Let gratitude be the last thought before you go to sleep. Let gratitude also be your first thought when you wake up in the morning. We’re gonna have a hard time ever being happy if we aren’t thankful for what we already have.
5. Plan a trip
There are many places in the world, in your country, in your area that you have not been yet, too many people you have not met yet, it is very possible that you find the person of your dreams somewhere who could give you everything you have always wanted in love (your prince charming or princess Cinderella), believe in love and make friends. Make plans with your family, with your friends.
6. Help others
Help other people, be part of something important, give charity, if you can’t afford a charity, give blood, by doing this it gives you satisfaction which will make you happy.
My life doesn’t always look exactly like I want it to. I spend many days writing alone in my living room or having nothing to do just watching outside the world & found people so happy, so rich, so glamorous, so cheerful. I don’t have much money to buy all happiness, buy a perfect relationship or buy my inner happiness which is sometimes very hard to accept. I felt jealous. I know there are many people who think of me but never express so they were not happy like me. But again I think the world doesn’t change all that much if I have more money, a different space, a better job, or a nicer car. The wrapping paper is different, but the gift inside stays the same.
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The way I feel about myself, how much I open myself to new people and experiences, how often I choose to smile simply because it feels good—none of these things depends on my life situation. I start believing life is in the details. Ongoing small gestures can mean so much more than one grand display of love. Simple pleasures throughout the day can be far more gratifying than one amazing weekend. When you connect the dots between all these little joys, life seems fuller and more satisfying. If you always look toward tomorrow for happiness, odds are you will do the same when you attain what you’ve been dreaming of. As strange it sounds, the ability to appreciate what’s in front of you has nothing to do with what you actually have. It’s more about how you measure the good things in your life at any given time. But here I am, writing this post, believing in these words, and knowing that every single day I am getting closer and closer to living the happy life I’ve secretly dreamed of living. If I can do it, you can do it. Believe in yourself and remember the most important lesson of all… a positive outlook is a choice. Choose to be positive. Choose to be happy. Life is short.
I’ve created a list of all the little things that fill me with bliss & make me Happier. Here’s what I’ve got so far:
1. Proper Breakfast. Start my day with a proper breakfast, which makes my day alive & brings me happiness in the morning.
2. A smile from a stranger; give one and you may get one. Keep smiling when I buy vegetables or hop auto so it also feels the opposite person happy.
3. A small gesture of kindness from someone who loves me. The remote control my sister or mother handed over—now that’s love.
4. My music, when I want it makes me feel better & away from my sadness.
5. Five minutes of deep breathing.
6. A small victory. Either walking for 30 minutes or crossing my limit of exercise or making my family happy with jokes.
7. A small change to my routine to make my day exciting.
8. An opportunity to be creative. Don’t wait for one—make one. Start a journal or a scrapbook, or get creative a routine task at work to make it more exciting. I used to write a blog, doing social sites to share my knowledge with friends & gather from them.
9. A snack or beverage you savour. Do you know how that girl in the commercial seems to get way too much pleasure from a foamy latte she made at home? That girl could be you.
10. Playing a game I loved as a child. Pull out Candy land or Temple Run and tap into the simplicity of childhood.
11. An extra half-hour of sleep. Hit the sack a little earlier one night and see how this changes your day.
12. A spa-like shower experience. Sometimes I go for beauty therapy which relaxes my mind, and stress & makes me happy, giving me the courage to feel beautiful.
13. A long phone conversation, with my mom, my granny, and good friends make my day good.
14. Something so funny it makes me laugh out loud…not in LOL form.
15. Dreaming someone takes your hand in theirs. There’s something blissfully intimate and meaningful about holding hands. Reach out and touch someone. (Cue the music.)
16. A book I’ve been dying to read.
17. A small gesture of support. In front of the mirror, either morning or evening sometimes I speak to myself: “I believe in you.” Minor actions have a huge impact.
18. Extending a small courtesy and watching the effect. Hold the door for someone or thank them for something most people wouldn’t notice.
19. Find happiness in the job I have now. If I have a positive outlook, I will make the best of any job; and if I have good relationships, I won’t depend on my job for a sense of meaning. I’ll find meaning in interactions with people. I use my job as a crutch instead of relying on it for meaning.
20. Exercise to boost energy. I knew, intellectually, that this worked, but how often have I told myself, “I’m just too tired to go to the gym”? Exercise is one of the most dependable mood boosters. Even a 10-minute walk can brighten my outlook.
21. Take action. The past is valuable. Learnt from my mistakes. Learnt from the mistakes of others. it doesn’t define me.
22. Rearrange the furniture. Maybe it’s just me, but I feel a sense of accomplishment when I do this, and I also really enjoy the novelty of creating a space with a different feel.
23. Grab my camera and go outside with a mission to capture things that make me happy.
24. Make a list of all the amazing things I’ve accomplished and experienced this year and then bask in the beauty of it all.
I am no one to advise you, but trust me I know sometimes you feel alone like me..You want to be the world’s happiest person like me, & I tried why not you, at least trying is the first step of the word possible.
1. Be your Own Best Friend. Enjoy your own company. Embrace everything about you! Without a doubt, it’s the most important step towards being a happy person.
2. Sing Out Loud! Shut the doors and the windows tight, put on your favourite song, and let your voice ring!
3. Expect a Miracle. Believe that something wonderful will happen for you today. The universe is waiting to shower happy blessings on you.
4. Laugh at Your mistakes. We all make mistakes; none of us is perfect. Forgive your imperfections, accept your faults, and laugh.
5. Sleep well. Seven or eight hours each night should increase your energy and decrease moodiness.
6. Count Your Blessings Daily. Gratitude, the emotion of thankfulness, is one of the key ingredients for living a happy life. Make gratitude a habit and happiness will be yours.
7. Wake Up Early!. Start the day off on a happy foot, with a happy thought. The morning hours are full of energy. Do your work in the morning.
8. Create a Positive Affirmation. Think about it, read it, say it, sing it! “My happiness brings me more happiness. I am happy. I believe in myself.”
9. Say “Good Job!”.Give yourself permission to pat yourself on the back. Recognize your accomplishments and positive qualities.
10. Catch Happiness from Others. Remembering that happiness is contagious, surround yourself with happy, positive people who share your values, goals, and dreams. Being around people who are content buoys your own mood. And by being happy yourself, you give something back to those around you. Friends and family help you celebrate life’s successes and support you in difficult times. Although it’s easy to make friends and family for granted, these relationships need nurturing.
11. Pencil in ‘Quiet’ Time Each and every day sit awhile, without television, without magazines, without the Internet. Just be!
12. Look to the Future Set goals and then make plans to succeed and take action. Pursuing something we value always makes us happy. By focusing on small improvements and mini-goals, you’ll naturally move toward your larger dreams. And you’ll respect the way you’re doing things.
13. Accept What You Cannot Change Don’t waste your precious time, energy, or thoughts on something that is beyond your control. Let it go.
14. Love Everything Love who you are. Love what you are doing. Love the person you’re with. Love your friends and your enemies, too. Love! Love! Love!
15. Stop Excuses Make no time for excuses. Excuses are only rationalizations that make you feel better about yourself for not doing something you want/need to be doing. Stop bitching, and start doing.
16. Be Positive. What you put out into the universe will come back to you, so change the way you think, immediately. Stop thinking of life as a glass half empty, but rather, half full. You have so much to be grateful for if only you took a moment to appreciate it. Anything is possible in the mind of a positive thinker. Winners have the ability to manufacture their own optimism. No matter what the situation, think of your current situation (however hard it may be) and then think of how much harder some other people have it. Just be happy that you are not in that worse situation. Learn to enjoy your life!
Every day is a new opportunity to be better than yesterday; that pursuit can increase your self-esteem and, accordingly, your happiness.
17. Stop envying others Learn to appreciate what you have. Everyone’s life is unique; you have certain things to offer that others cannot. When we act in a jealous manner, all we do is bring negative feelings into our lives. There is no reason to be insecure in life. If there are things you are self-conscious about, go out into the world and seek to change them. Only you have the ability to create the best version of yourself.
18. Learn to forgive. When you “hate” someone, and you’re continuously thinking about it, those negative emotions are toxic to your well-being. You put yourself in a state of sucker-ism (technical term) and it stays with you throughout your day. So make your life blissful & forgive others.
19. Try to trust the world once again. Think about how beautiful life is and be grateful that you are healthy. Make yourself believe that you are able to continue a happy life, that there are more colours and happiness in the world which you have not encountered yet.
20. Take care of your body. Taking care of your body is crucial to being the happiest person you can be. If you don’t have your physical energy in good shape, then your mental energy (your focus), your emotional energy (your feelings), and your spiritual energy (your purpose) will all be negatively affected. So stay healthy, and clean.
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On 1st January 2014, I decided I was going to make a change in my life. I was going to start looking for the good, seeking the positive, and striving to make every day a joyful experience. This was something I would have never imagined myself doing, but it’s something that has impacted my life every single day since then. I’ve had to do a lot to get to where I am right now, and I still believe I have a long way to go. I want is to be happy, to live a life that focuses more on the good than the bad.
Recently, as I struggle to be positive about certain challenging situations in my life, I’ve been giving some serious thought to how I transformed my outlook from a negative-focused to a more positive-focused one. (Note: I don’t always see the good. Like everyone, I have good days and bad days, but, for the most part, there has been a BIG shift in my attitude over the past year or so).
Though I have to admit that there are many, many factors involved in my personal development — such as the countless books and blogs I read, creating my blog and surrounding myself with happy, supportive people — I can say that, at the most basic level, choosing to be positive has helped me the most in terms of becoming the person I want to be.
If you want your life to change, realize that:
Whether you are positive or negative, the situation does not change. So, we mind as well be positive.
Awesome Post Pamela…Indeed on Lifestyle as well Motivation Issues !wellwriten
Pankaj
Thank you 🙂
I hope you won’t mind a little criticism as well. Though the post speaks a lot about positivity and happiness but the means it puts forwards to achieve that are like a jungle of ideas. It seems more like an index of a book. One would love a different post on each one of these points separately along with the personal experience (if any).
Thanks for your comment..next time ll keep in mind 🙂
I totally agree with your points. So much to ponder. However it has been difficult for me to remain happy since last year. When you are burdened with family responsibilities, going out is the only escape and even that has been snatched away. I am a happy go lucky person by nature, but somehow I am losing my true self.
A very positive post indeed. Much needed one especially in these difficult times. The pics in the blog are really beautiful.
This is such a positive post indeed . I would say a much needed as well,I have started to meditate recently and it is helping me
Excellent post. One needs to cheer themselves up. Came at the right time when we see negativity all around.
Totally agree with you Happiness is a state of mind that needs to be always maintained to lead a healthy and long life. I loved how you have shared ways we ca remain happy and spread happiness around.
The best way to be happy is by living each and every moment in the present. One should not dwell on the past or worry about the future. Keep smiling! Sandy N Vyjay
I often think of the productivity part. I feel i am not doing much in life and due to lockdown this thing (unproductivity part) hits me more hard. I related to most of the parts you have mentioned.
Such beautiful post. Yes these are all the things that can help us in being happy and it is important to focus on happiness of oneself than anything.
I have to be honest. You write about positivity and while it’s all good, I feel a lot of people don’t really understand the deeper connotations of what it takes. Sometimes it’s about giving more than asking. A lot of heartburn can be avoided that way.
I totally agree with you and there are so many points to be happy in life why we worry for small things that’s why I keep saying myself to be happy and do things that make you happy and your family
Very inspiring blog. Loved it
Totally agree happiness is the state of mind . This is such a positive post indeed . I would say a much needed as well
Happiness is definitely the way of life. Problems and negativity keep hitting us often but keeping your head above water and trying the tips you have mentioned help alot.
Happiness is that ray of hope that keeps us going. Little moments of happiness can also be so reenergizing right? Loves all your pointers for finding those happy moments.
I agree with all your points here but also happiness contributes to well-being and directly reduces mental disorders such as stress depression and anxiety.
Expressing gratitude for what I have and finding small happiness in life has given me a lot of inner happiness. These 2 practices have been a game-changer for me. Being a copywriter, it used to be really difficult for me to focus and these helped me so much in that. Check out my site- http://www.shivanshibhatia.com
I like your tips. Happiness is an intangible aspect of our lives. It changes our percpetion to the world around us. And it also helps us live a healthier life. Above all, we are the guardians of our own happiness.